Wednesday, September 17, 2014

Post Card #4: Book of Mormon

Post Card #3: F- You Maybe-man

Flavor Text
About twelve miles west of Salt Lake City is the greatest water wonder in all the world--the Great Salt Lake. It has no outlet, is opaline green in color, and averages 22 percent salt-almost to saturation. The water is ideal for bathing--you "float like a cork" and come out' refreshed, invigorated, and hungry.

"F-u you Maybe-Man" 
I was coming into work when the elevator doors opened. Inside was a doughy faced, tan scrubs wearing ER tech with a heavy-duty cart. Looking at him I knew I saw him the previous weekend doing errands. (wedding gift Shopping #eww) "I think I saw you this weekend." "Maybe" "Was it Pet Smart?" "Maybe." "Target?" "Maybe." he said pushing his cart over the threshold.  "You have a familiar face." "Maybe." I am embarrassed now. Like the time freshman year of college, I saw Jeffry Plumb (a guy I was friends with in Middle school) in line at the movies. He did not remember me. I did. He made me feel stupid for remembering, a face. The doors closed. I pressed (4) and sighed "Maybe Man" had farted in the elevator. I rode to work ashamed in his farts. T.M.

1/9/21 Revisit
I sent this card to a friend and coworker Linda Derosa.

Post Card #2: "Mouthwash"


"Mouth Wash"
My wife and I had to run errands. She came out of the bathroom smelling
like Scope, Leaving the bedroom she asked if I was coming...
Of course, I was not ready. I was playing video games... and I still had to pee. I quickly ran into the bathroom and as I was peeing there was a small travel-sized bottle of purple scope on the sink.  
Not wanting to be the only one in the car with foul breath. I opened the bottle and emptied what was left into my mouth.  
A split second of swishing later I realize it is not Scope.
I was peeing, penis in hand, with a mouthful of acetone. I spat it back into the toilet... dripping cool evaporating nail polish remover on my penis and hands as my mouth watered and coughed.

1/9/21 Revisit
I sent this to my friend Paul Pearce. We are still friends.  We send weird videos (mostly music) back and forth to one another. 

Postcard #1: Virgin

This is my first mailed postcard.  I want to try something new.  Something that will transcend Facebook.  A service that over the past 3-4 months has really started to depress me.  People upset me.  And I am afraid that I inflict the same sort of annoyance or boredom on other people when I post.   I have tried to teach myself that things said on the internet should be taken with a grain of salt.  But...what if it's peoples lives?  My life?
I would seriously delete Facebook if it wasn't for two things.  1) My wife wants me to remain on it and 2) so many other services and contacts are woven into it that it makes it impossible to separate the two.
I sent this one to my friend Jen Kirby.  My first postcard of my new project.  The reverse side of it is of a personal nature so I am not going to post it.  Which I am sure will not be the last time.  But I am hoping it will encourage some correspondence while at the same time encouraging me to write more.
If you would like to recieve a post card.  I will need your address. me in some way.