Postcard #187: ItchyGu

 

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Stop me if I've told you this...

Throughout my life, when playing RPG's on console's I've had a few "go-to" names for characters. "Penshaw" has been used quite a bit. I've named characters after historical and mythological figures (Semiramis, Dante/Virgil/Crowley). Randomness: Neutroid, Ümlaut, Calamity. And who hasn't named a character Fart, Poop, or some other "bad" word? But to this day...the most common name I use for saves or main characters is "Itchygu" one day, back in the middle school formative years. My friend Juan P. and I started a new save game of Zelda 2 (I think). The Adventure of Link, the oft-maligned side-scrolling adventure game of the series. When it came time to name Link, my friend volunteered the name "Itchy" and the name of my chocolate lab "Gus". But the interface would only allow 7 characters. I still play ItchyGu even if I can enter the whole 8 characters. I need all the luck and nostalgia I can get during my formative 40 years.

-TM

Postcard #186: Uninauguration

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Most people estimate the crowd size at your Jan 2016 inauguration an average attendance of 300k to 600k. Many health experts believe that by your Jan 2021 termination date that upwards of 410k people might be dead from Covid-19. Personally, I think it would be fitting if they filled the National Mall with four hundred and ten thousand coffins.  Each representing an American life that you failed. This way you will be able to see what a well-attended rally you made actually look like while simultaneously being able to show you what a complete and utter failure you are as a president and leader. 

-T.M.

Postcard #185: 242k to 248k

 

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Dear President Trump,

It's a week since you lost the election. I am writing to you to remind you that over 2428,000 (updated) people AMERICANS have died from Covid- 19 related illness. I wonder how many of us might be alive if you just pretended for a few moments that some people might be smarter than you.  If you just told the American people to wear masks and socially distance. All these deaths, I lay at your feet, you evil narcissist. -TM.

I wrote this card and haven't mailed it yet. 6 thousand people have died since I wrote this card.  Six fucking thousand people have died since I wrote this card.  SIX.  THOUSAND. PEOPLE.  Just in the United States alone...

Postcard #184: Common Sense

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The doctor was standing in front the nurses station having walked over from one end of the Covid patient block of rooms. She is still wearing her isolation gown, gloves, goggles, and mask. She announces that she just separated the dirty and clean isolation and prep tables outside the patient rooms. There is a silent pause among all the nurses sitting at the computers. "I separated the clean and dirty tables... they were right next to each other?" "Okay."  Someone muttered. "Thank you(?)." Another person said with the faintest hint of a Question mark. "They can't be so close together... the clean... the dirty tables." "Yes. Yes, doctor. Thank you." I looked at her and wondered if she changed her gloves after touching the table. I wish I had a Book of Gold star stickers to put next to the nurse's station or screening station... to award people when they ask for recognition when they do their jobs or simply use common sense. -TM www.minormumbles.com

This was sent via postcrossing to MonikaDvorakova.  She wanted a Unesco WHS card.  This is a postcards of Fountains Abbey I have plenty of those.  But I kinda like sending postcards of locations before the UN came around and thought it was worth saving.  

Postcard #183: Locals

 

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So I voted pretty much straight down the ticket for democrats and progressive candidates. Trump is a lunatic. A racist, sexist, narcissist. I honestly don't care that he is a philander but he is a huge liar. Biden is not my first choice, neither is Kamala. The two-party system blows, I don't much care for our mayor, Ted Wheeler. But Iannarone comes off as a certified grade-A whack job. I cannot stand how incapable Chloe Eudaly, is at understanding the concerns of people with different points of view. Mingus Mapps got his ass thoroughly handed to him by her in the debate. So we are fucked regardless of who wins city Commissioner. All the measures are for increases in taxes, to which I have mixed feelings about ... part of me & feels... EAT THE RICH. But the other part feels like why must this state be soooo anticapitalist? Ehh... I voted for all the measures including legalizing psilocybin and taxing tobacco products' and e-cigarettes...I wish they could just tox the shit out of e-ciggs. There was also a measure to decriminalize low-level drug possession. Which is great Portland is stupidly defunding police while we are kinda turning into a lawless drug-addled angry "anarchist Jurisdiction."

I sent this via postcrossing to Poolata.  In hindsight, I would not have written about local politics in Portland OR on a card from Wyoming.  But the person wanted volcanos and landscape stuff.  So...I figured this was a good one.  This card is from my collection when  I drove across the country from the east to west coast.  Postage Be.  

Postcard #182: Vote.

 

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It's November 2nd. My wife and I just finished dinner. It feels... like how I felt the night before a hurricane was due to strike. I feel like I should be doing something but there is nothing to do until the new pandemonium begins. These past four years have been "stupid chaos" and there is a chance whole new starting "stupid chaos" that I am completely unfamiliar with. Maybe it's dangerous maybe it's more of the same... maybe it will be a glimpse of sanity. When people talk about the election and I am unsure of the political affiliation I just comment that it is wonderful that this election is on track to have the most voter participation since 1908... but that is only 65%. I will then ask people should it be our goal to make this # = 100? Tonight marks my last night in blissful ignorance of how bad it can actually be...It feels a whole lot like when Trump won against HRC.

I sent this to my friend KC/  This is kinda being posted after the fact.  But oh well. Since quite literally...no one reads my blog does it matter if I am backdating this card? I put a first-class stamp on this because last time I am pretty sure someone stole the postcard I sent my father.  I always have my doubts that these sorts of postcards will read their destinations.  I ran packing tape over the front of it to make it more "glossy postcard".  

Postcard #181: Security

 

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I knelt down and my daughter climbed upon my knee. The mailbox key in one hand and pulled herself up with the other, "Why did they take it, daddy?" "I don't know why they took your step stool honey." (We had a step stool out there next to the mailbox to help her but it vanished.) "Why?" "Why what?" "Why?" she persisted as she struggled to put the key into the mailbox. And I said, "For the same reason we have a mailbox with a lock on it. People are selfish and take things that don't belong to them." "Oh...why?"I sighed. "Honey. Just get the mail." "Okay." She said as she turned the key and swung the door open. "Oooohh!" She exclaimed as she reached in to grab an assortment of junk mail and political flyers. "You like those, eh?" asked shifting on my knee with her weight. "YESS!" She said enthusiastically pulling them out one by one. "Okay, Please hand them me please." She complied. "And now, close it up." "Okay!" She closed the mailbox...locked it...and in one clean motion put the keys into the dropbox essentially locking the only set of mailbox keys  - inside the mailbox. "Why?" I asked.

Sent via postcrossing to StrawBerryBlossom.  She wanted strawberries.  I do not have strawberries.  Nor have I ever had a strawberry card.  But this card is from my personal collection.  I think I have had this one since well before Postcrossing.  Postage be!  This is a true story.  I had to dismantle my mailbox in order to turn the mailbox over to spill the keys out.  Then reattach the mailbox to make sure I can continue to get more dumb political flyers and junkmail.  It certainly did speak to the importance of getting a duplicate.  

Postcard 180: Max Challenge Attempt #1

 

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Fall is setting into the Pacific Northwest. Here in Portland Oregon it is a cold drizzly morning 39°F. When I let my dog out this morning it was so foggy that I thought it was smoke. About a month ago we had some very bad fires here on the west coast. There were days the sky was orange and grey and you could not see more than 50 ft. I am sending you this card because you essentially asked for it. You wanted something for your kids but ultimately you wanted something colorful. You have a lot of rules. No art (is this card considered art?) No ad cards. (I guess I can understand that one) But no handmade cards. (This one rule... a lot of people have .... Why? Are they really that bad? How do you define handmade?) I was going to send this card to an American but I sent it to you. I don't know why. Maybe I will contemplate that when I write to the American.  I have 6-7 postcards I have to write today. I think I am more productive with Postcrossing when I am under pressure. So I will generate several addresses at once to fuel my creativity. Lately, it seems like card selection takes the most time. The text on this card is pretty much generated by your demand that I write as much as I can on the card. When I told my wife this... she laughed. She knows how small and bad my handwriting can be. This is my smallest pen... a Pigma micron 005.  This is the pen I normally postcard with a micron 02.  I usually write my drafts with this pen, a micron 03 or this... a micron PN. It's hard to write with the 005. Today is Halloween. I don't think we will get many trick or treaters because of Covid (we really shit the bed with that have in the states) it's important to carve out some normalcy where you can. -tm OCTOBER 31, 2020 (HALLOWEEN)

Sent via Postcrossing to Caddi. She said she wants colorful and something she could show her kids.  But she did say she wanted me to write as much as I can.  So I have been presented with a new challenge.  MAX WORDS! This card is 340 words.  I am pretty sure I can beat that.  Her birthday is Christmas eve!  Mine is the day after Christmas! I could have mentioned that!  That would have gotten me over 350 certainly.  Maybe next time.  

Postcard #179: Recent Dream

 

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I had a dream last night my wife and I had to give up our child for adoption. Not explained. We simply had to give our child, Ursa, up. We had to interview people scores of people who I just don't remember aside from the thought there were many. But it was clear that no one could love or provide for her better than my wife and I. We had to settle for "less than" parents for our child. I woke up before the dream ended... I was hoping to speak to a judge to reverse the adoption.

Sent Via postcrossing to jannatpac.  She wanted foxes.  I had none.  But I did have this nifty little Oilette postcard of a fox hunt.  That has to count for something. It looks like someone else liked it at some point because there is a thumbtack hole in two corners.  

Another convert for the First Nonsecular Church of the Travelling Correspondance Card!  POSTAGE BE! Let us bow our heads and stamp.

Postcard #178: After Party

 

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I was invited to a wedding in upstate NY by an ex-girlfriend... well a woman I went out with a few times... but nothing really ever happened. The wedding was far enough from my house I had to get a room. The wedding was nice enough. I remember her telling me it was very expensive. My date and I had a decent time... and I am pretty sure I was only invited to somehow be made jealous. But I did not care...the person I had taken as my date was infinitely more enjoyable than the bride ever was. The ceremony started late and the reception followed.  Suddenly it was 4 pm and everything was over... no after-parties... nothing. My date and I were stone sober, in a boring city. We went back to the hotel lied to them that we had an emergency we had to get back to and they refunded us half our room. We took that money and rented a room in Atlantic City...2-3 hours away. We sped there. My date looked Amazing. I looked pretty decent still too. We got drunk. Gambled all night, wandered around A.C. I had fun...more fun than I did at the wedding.  I don't think we ever went back.

Sent Via postcrossing to NikBab81.  

I freehanded this.  It's obvious.  Sorry Nikbab.  There are a few things I would have reworded or moved around.  Normally I write a draft.  But I was crunching 8 postcards this weekend. I am still sitting on one more. I hope I can get that one completed today.  I have the card picked out but I do not know what I am going to write.  Maybe I will tell him how I voted since the election is almost here.   I will freehand that...because...I need to get better at first drafting stuff.  I think I will go with that as a new tag.   

Postcard #177: Rodentia

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My mother was denied pets while growing up so when she became a parent she answered any demands we had for pets. I had gerbils and hamsters growing up. I think I even had mice at one point.  I had habi-trail tubes that went all over the place. My room smelled of cedar chips and rodent urine...no matter how often I cleaned the cage... they would pee in the habi-trail tunnels. Rodents can be vicious things. I had a female hamster named Hillary... who I assume I named after Hillary Clinton. I remember she once ate her babies, (the hamster did I can not speak for HRC.) She also attacked "Andrew", her mate. I think I named him after the hurricane (1992). She cut his belly open and his intestines spilled out. He died. She was a very nice hamster to me... just not anyone else. I only had gerbils for a short time. They bit. All the time. I could never handle them. I once had a cage of gerbils escape. They chewed through the screen top and out to freedom. One of them crawled into an open electrical socket.  (Our house was always in a state of demolition/remodeling) and it chewed on a live wire and died. Another one I found dead in the front yard. I think it was killed by one of our cats. The third one vanished I assume it went on to live its best gerbil life free of the burdens of being a pet. -TM www.minormumbles.com 

Sent via postcrossing to DelilahCal.  

Postcard #176: Golden Years

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I call my grandmother at least once a week since moving away from NJ to Or. She is 94. W talk about the weather. I tell her about her great grandchild Ursa, and what she has been up to. She asks when I will come to visit and I sadly tell her until there is a Coronavirus vaccine I can't risk coming to see her. Whenever I ask how she is doing she says one of 2 things. "I am doing pretty good for an old Broad." OR - "The golden years...the only thing Golden is your urine." God bless her. -TM.

Sent via Postcrossing to nkarnof.  And I will be completely frank...she has a better profile than a good chunk of the people on Postcrossing and she seems pretty cool. All business.  No demands.  Love it.